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Joke of the Day

"Summer and winter had been growing apart as friends... when summer called up winter she ask him why he was so cold."

"""I'm going to show off my new belt by tucking in my T-shirt"" -Men over 50."

"Almost every McDonalds A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunchtime. She said 'sorry about the wait'. I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually'."

"A sitcom about teen girl aliens called UFOMG."

"When I found out Top Gear was being cancelled... I was so shocked it was like a punch in the face."

"If Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus was written today... The solar system would need more planets for the title."

"Two drums and a symbol fall off a cliff. Bud dum tsss"

"What do ghosts get arrested for? Possession."

"What's brown and furry on the inside and clear on the outside? King Kong in clingfilm"

"I can't understand why people say my girlfriend's legs look like matchsticks. They do look like sticks - but they certainly don't match."