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Joke of the Day

"If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton ended up in a car crash who would be saved? America"

"With the exchange rate, Canadians only have 120 characters on Twitter. So we have less room to be clever than Ameri"

"What is Joan of Arc's least favorite food? Steak"

"How do you catch a rabbit? You hide in a field and make carrot noises."

"Why do Jewish men have to be circumcised? Because a Jewish women wont touch anything unless it's 20% off."

"People who say their migraine is going to be the death of them are totally right because I just killed a lady right after she said that."

"I feel I'm at my most culturally sensitive when I call Dell tech support and don't scream, ""What the fuck are you saying?"""

"What did the clam say when a crab attacked him? Kelp!"

"Q: Why aren't Hindu and Chinese people allowed to play hockey? A: Because everytime they go into the corner they open up a convienent store."

"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you'll wish you had a fucking club and a spade."