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Joke of the Day

"McDonalds should have a 3rd window where you can trade in the wrong stuff that they gave you at the 2nd window."

"A guy just yelled at me for texting and driving. I told him to get off my hood and mind his own business."

"A line for cops who pull over attractive drunk models If I could put you in the alphabet, I would go D U I and that's why I'm a writer, I look forward to your hatred of bad jokes"

"Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs after a house fire? Stephen Hawking's"

"It's hard telling how many Kleenex I've fathered."

"Why did the coke can throw itself off the building, and why did it become so famous? It was soda pressed"

"I dreamt I was making a salad. I was tossing all night."

"Awful pun I came up with whilst drunk last night. Who is the Australian Frankesntein's favourite singer? Rihanna, mate."

"Why don't Nazi's like strip clubs? Because, they don't like Poles."

"Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Nevermind, I just boiled the egg."