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Joke of the Day

"What do we want? TO BE LESS INSECURE? When do we want it? NOW! Um, I think... Soon, I guess? Is that weird? When do people usually want it?"

"America is basically a free country... you'd just have to inherit 19 trillion dollars in debt"

"What type of bee makes milk instead of honey? Boobees!!!"

"Saying ""oh my gosh you're getting so big!"" is cute and acceptable to say to a 6 year old. Not so much to an ex-girlfriend."

"You know what a Walrus and Tupperware have in common? They're both looking for a tight seal"

"I know a joke about frequencies But I'll not share it, because the punch line is so bad it hertz."

"How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it."

"How do Ghosts get Drunk? Booze."

"People say America is free, but Korea is free too! Whenever I was born, my parents gave me a choice: Piano or Violin."

"*walks up to a group of sad people at a funeral* Do y'all know the wifi password"