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Joke of the Day
"Have you heard about the new Web MD zodiac? All the signs say Cancer."
Next Joke
"What do you call a very cold vodka? Absolut Zero"
"So weird that before we invented cars, if you hated someone you keyed their horse."
"Special shout-out to various coworkers for keeping me warm during this chilly weather by wearing perfume that burns my eyes and lungs."
"Do you know how to catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!"
"My wife says I have a drinking problem.. I don't remember ever getting blackout drunk though."
"The doctor told my wife her cervix is still really hard last night. How would the doctor know that without sticking her whole hand......omg"
"My hobbies include humming the Jurassic Park theme song to my chickens, to make them feel more in touch with their ancestors."
"A somewhat amusing joke Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? He had LOCOmotives"
"(Music Theory) Why do composers win debates? Because when their opponent makes a point, they always respond with a valid counterpoint."