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Joke of the Day

"The real problem with kissing a perfect 10 The cops come chasing after you"

"A mushroom walks into a bar... And the bartender says ""We don't serve your kind here"". So the mushroom says ""Why? I'm a fun guy""."

"We decided to name our unborn child something that represents where it was conceived. Only 7 more months until baby Uber is born!"

"A skeleton walks into a bar... orders a beer and a mop."

"What state is the highest on every top 50 list? Colorado."

"The first time I used an elevator it was really uplifting Then it brought me down"

"The only problem with shopping online is that you can't sit on a bench in the mall and judge everyone else who walks by."

"Ugh: I hid three dozen raw eggs in the house last night after taking Ambien and now I can't find them."

"My mate in Scotland reckons his scrotum got to -273 degrees last night. I reckon that's absolute bollocks"

"""How big do you suppose that fence is?"" ""I reckon that fence is around a yard."""