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Joke of the Day

"6.9 A good time interrupted by a period"

"A man tried to force his wife to take an aspirin when she got in bed with him. She began yelling and saying ""I don't have a headache!"" The man replied, ""Good, let's fuck."""

"Making plans with a stoner is like having sex with a prostitute... ...They tell you they're coming, but you know it's a lie."

"Dating tip: Girls love mysterious guys. For example, tell her ""Im a lawyer.Or AM I?"" then hum the Twilight Zone theme and turn into an eagle"

"So after how many speeding tickets am I qualified to be an honorary race car driver?"

"What do you call a cross between a turducken and a tofurkey? A turfucken."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my cock down your mom's throat."

"What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? Hand eyeeeeeeeeee"

"Why is it illegal for a man living in North Carolina to be buried in South Carolina? Because he's alive."

"What do you call a cow that can go 3000 feet per second? A bull-ette."