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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the cheese truck that crashed? The street was littered with de brie"

"Remember April showers bring May flowers. But, Mayflowers being smallpox."

"Half of all bears are smarter than the average bear. It's not that big a deal."

"My friend told me he walked into his house and saw that the sheets of paper in his office were having an orgy. I asked him, ""How does paper cum?"" ""Why,"" he replied, ""in stacks, of course."""

"I just bought a Pontiac that sexually identifies as a Ferrari It's a Trans Am"

"So, would you ever tell anybody if you woke naked in the middle of the woods, hung over with a sore ass? Wanna go camping?"

"I'm so sorry my pet rock attacked you. Its just he really hates arrogant douche bags. Thank god he only hit your face."

"She said she was a free spirit. That's good. Wasn't sure how I'd pay for a spirit."

"When did the 100 years war get serious? When the English got Crecy"

"So I was in the movie theatre... and I was watching an incredibly sad film. So sad that the man behind me started wailing, then he hit me in the head with a harpoon."