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Joke of the Day

"I joined Twitter to have something to do while I waited for the repairman. It's only been 3 years, he should be here any month now."

"What do you do with a dead chemist? Barium -old but good"

"Q:Whats is fat ugly and gives good head? A:Your mom OOOOOOOooooooOOOOOOooooo"

"How can you tell when your girlfriend is getting fat? When she can fit into your wife's clothes."

"How are you doing in arithmetic ? I've learned to add up the zeros but the numbers are still giving me trouble."

"Why did the boy think you hit menopause when you graduated high school? Because it was the end of all your periods."

"I was in the supermarket and I thought I saw my name on a loaf of bread. I looked again and it said ""thick cut""."

"What's the difference between golf and Lady Godiva? One is a hunt on a course."

"What else do you need when you use your Batman shampoo? Conditioner Gordon."

"What did the blonde say when someone blew in her ear? Thanks for the refill. "