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Joke of the Day

"So glad guys with twirly mustaches don't tie up girls to railroad tracks anymore."

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"After a long journey Frodo and Sam arrive to return the One Ring to the fires of Mt. Doom Frodo: Dude dont be mad, but I forgot the receipt"
"Why are quantum physicists the kinkiest of all scientists? They have the ability to penetrate both holes at the same time. [explanation](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double-slit_experiment)"
"Jurassic Park III on AMC. 10 min. in, 2 young scientists studying dinosaur fossils. FOSSILS. Hey, 'member how THERE ARE ALIVE DINOSAURS NOW?"
"Walks into a Bar A man walked into a Florida bar with his crocodile and asked the bartender: ""Do you serve lawyers here?"" ""Sure."" ""Good. One beer for me and a lawyer for my crocodile."""
"Q: What does a king do when he burps? A: He issues a royal pardon."
"You're a vegetarian? That's a missed steak"
"The Horse Joke So, there was a fly, and the fly entered the horse's ass; finally when the fly wanted to go out, the horse wasn't there anymore."
"*Reversing my car* Ahh, this takes me back."
"If acne on your back is ""back-ne""... Then what is acne on your knee called?"