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Joke of the Day

"An unemployed prostitute approaches a brothel manager and asks for a job. The manager regrettably replies, ""Sorry, we have too many openings right now."""

"France and Italy Go to War. Who Wins? Neither. France Surrenders, and Italy Changes Sides."

"The secret to having all of your dreams come true is to keep changing your dreams to something that's just about to happen anyway."

"How do you circumcise a hillibilly? You kick his sister in the jaw!"

"Why are men afraid of the world? They spend 9 months trying to get out of a woman and the rest of their life trying to get back in."

"A lady goes to the emergency room with a vibrator stuck in her cooter. The doctor says, ""That's going to be hard to remove."" She says, ""I don't want it removed. Just change the batteries for me."""

"Friend: your not going to believe this but my whole family was killed in a freak accident! Me: *you're"

"Women that date guys with bad grammar are the goodest."

"""I see that you're wearing a black shirt, so I'm going to be extra affectionate today."" -Cats"

"Girl, yo grammatical atrocities so huge, you need typosuction."