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Joke of the Day

"2019: Tumblr blinks offline, satisfied, having completed its mission of collecting all existing TV and film footage as GIF files."

"DR DOG: have you been taking your diabetes meds daily? PATIENT: no DR DOG: *hits him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper* Bad patient!"

"My God: dead. My world: disenchanted. My invitation on LinkedIn: declined."

"What should you wear when drinking tea? A tea-shirt."

"My wife looked different today then it dawned on me. Her mouth was closed..."

"""Toilet joke * Dirty ""Toilet joke"" [Dirty] if it's yellow let it mellow if it's brown let it drown if it's red.... you could of spread?"

"Whale dad joke 'Dad, where did I come from?' 'From my penis' 'Oh...thanks.' 'You're whalecum.'"

"Where is the best place to hide a hippie's weed? Under the soap."

"""Are you a member of any organized political party?"" ""No. I'm a Republican."""

"If singer/actor Meat Loaf got sick and refused treatment... the newspapers headline could be ""Meat Loaf Aday keeps the doctor away"""