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Joke of the Day

"A real boyfriend will blow up his girl's phone when she's mad at him. She may not want to answer, but at least she'll see his effort."

Next Joke
 
"Daniel Day-Lewis is so method that in preparation for the role of Abraham Lincoln in 'Lincoln' he spent ten months on the side of a penny."
"Can one of you please tell my ex husband that I died? I feel like it would be more believable coming from someone other than me."
"Q. What do tired line dancers do? A. They Line Down :-)"
"Roses are red, violets are fine, I'll be the 6 if you'll be the 9."
"Can't afford a cat? Duct tape 3 squirrels together, next question"
"When do Arabs return their library books? the day they're Dubai."
"One time I walked in on my brother, masturbating. We locked eyes for what felt like forever. Then he yelled, ""Why the hell are you masturbating!?"""
"Golfer: ""Caddy do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?"" Caddy: ""The way you play sir it's a sin any day of the week!"""
"Don't forget to celebrate Columbus Day by moving in to someone else's house and telling everyone it's yours, then closing the post office."