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Joke of the Day

"If you put your ear up to a vagina... you can smell the ocean."

"Don't you hate it when someone answers their own question? I do."

"Had a rabbit that would come by every morning. I'd leave a bit of food for him. But he stopped coming one day. Now he's just some bunny that I used to know."

"If Arnold does star in the new Predator movie.. He would probably be sent back in time with his Expendables team to kill the Predator who was the actual John Connor."

"I used to copy Mitch Hedberg jokes and post them here. I still do, but I used to too..."

"Air Bud seems like a great movie, until you realize some poor kid was cut from the team to make room on the roster for a golden retriever"

"What do you call a cow...? What do you call a cow that's missing a leg? Lean Beef. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef. What do you call a cow that's masturbating? Beef Strokin-Off"

"The United States and Britain are having a competition on who can fuck themselves up the most. Britain is in the lead, but America has a Trump card."

"Who says, ""Bugs, you stole my hearing aids?! You're despicable!"" Deafy Duck"

"I've been married to my wife for 34 years. We now only have hallway sex... When you pass each other in the hallway and both just say ""Fuck You"""