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Joke of the Day

"How do you make tear-free soap? Don't use child labor."

"When my SO is sad, she likes to code. So I give her some &nbsp"

"A woman with a strong accent walks into a bar. Going in to order a drink, she asks for a beer. The bartender says ""Anheizer Busch?"" The woman says: ""Good! And how's your prick?"""

"Note to self: Before committing any murders, get head and shoulders. Can't be leaving DNA all over the place."

"Real laziness is being excited when plans get canceled."

"Yo mama's so stupid that she burned down the house with a CD burner."

"Maybe don't name your musical ""Rent"" if you don't even have songs that discuss real estate or leasing procedures. 0/10, very disappointing."

"What do you call a potted cactus that has grown in the shape of a penis? A dildon't"

"What's a panda's favorite kitchen dish? A pan....duh"

"According to my cousin's diploma, he graduated from an ""Institute of Fine Farts"" because I just made an adjustment to it with a sharpie."