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Joke of the Day
"I hate when I get so stoned that I can barely feel my legs and arms and antlers and wings."
Next Joke
"Yo momma joke Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, ""I need your weight not your phone number."""
"Don't you hate it when there's a really interesting topic and someone starts writing and [deleted]"
"How do you know someone is a vegan? Oh don't worry, they'll fucking tell you"
"Canadians like to brag about getting all four seasons: Winter Almost Winter After Winter Not Winter"
"Did you hear about the butcher who backed up into a meat grinder? Apparently he got a little behind in his orders."
"I won't visit /r/aww Its nothing but kitty porn"
"[NSFW] Useless things Q: What are the most useless items ever invented? A: Condoms. If you need one, she's too old."
"What do you call a homeless man who trashes food you give him then says he only accepts cash? A rootabaga."
"dispatch: we have a home invasion robbery in progress on the far side of the lake rowboat cop: *grabs oar* I'll be there in 6 hours"