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Joke of the Day

"I wish I gave Darth Vader different last words. Before he died, I wanted him to mutter, ""I should have stuck to pod racing."""

Next Joke
 
"[morning] her: did you dream about me? me: that depends...are you a member of the Backstreet Boys? her: umm no me: then no"
"I've got a 100 question vocab quiz this friday on 9/11... Well I guess I'm gonna bomb it"
"Two women are gardening when one pulls up a huge carrot, she says ""this reminds me of my husband"" and the other woman says, ""that big?"" and the first one says ""No, that dirty."""
"What did the number zero say to the number 8? I like your belt"
"If I had a time machine, I would just keep going back to bed."
"What's your spirit animal? ""An eagle. They're so majestic."" MEANWHILE Horse: hey eagle, what's your spirit human Eagle: this guy Dave"
"What do you call a man who used to like tractors? An extractor fan!"
"Chemistry Hotel So I was driving down the road, getting pretty tired on my way home and saw a sign that said ""Chemistry Hotel"" the sign said: *""Cheap Day Rates, and Even Cheaper NO3-'s""*"
"The courier delivered only half of my grizzly outfit today... So I choked him with my bear hands."