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Joke of the Day

"What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie? ""Well doggone !"""

"What was eating away at the computer's RAM storage? I don't know, but it was going at it one byte at a time."

"I drop it like it's an expensive electronic device I've recently purchased."

"""Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?"" Well, Katy, I'm thin, weak, white, and I hurt the environment so I guess that's a pretty apt simile"

"[on a plane] Stewardess: ""Would you like a mint? It'll help your ears during takeoff"" Me: ""Sure, can I have two?"" *puts one in each ear*"

"What do you call an overweight hobbit's belly? His Middle Girth"

"Where do werewolves live? In werehouses."

"The shutter speed of the iPhone 6's camera is so high... ...it can take a pic of a woman with her mouth shut"

"Why didn't the pigs eat the rotten eggs in their feed trough? They were saving the best for last."

"There's no I in anxiety. Wait. Yes there is. Oh my god oh my god oh my god"