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Joke of the Day

"Say what you will about Kombucha... ...It's just not my cup of tea."

"I just saw an 8 year old hipster. Your move, apocalypse."

"I always wanted to be just like my mother. Today I'm working on dramatically clutching my throat when I'm told the price of anything."

"Viagra thieves did you hear about the viagra thieves? The cops are looking for a group of hardened criminals"

"What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? My girlfriend knows about my wife."

"TIFU by posting in the wrong subreddit. Shit I thought this was /r/irony"

"What's the difference between a $20 prostitute and a $200 prostitute? When the $20 one swallows, it's because she's hungry."

"A priest, a rabbi and a duck all walk into a bar... [put your best punchlines in the comments, I couldn't think of anything]"

"Did you hear about the kid who got his legs blown off? He's a whole two feet shorter."

"Maced a hobo who started pulling cables out of my computer at work. Turned out to be the hipster IT guy and now I'm in HR again."