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Joke of the Day

"Im getting tired of the book ""Life of Pi."" It never ends."

"I've got a new job. I'm helping out a one-armed typist whenever she needs to type a capital letter. It's shift work"

"Why did the banker leave his job? he lost interest"

"A man was asked if he would rather have a new circular saw or a ladder... He chose the latter."

"Teacher: Can anyone give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze ? Pupil: Hot water !"

"I was on a date with a girl and she said ""did you notice my finger nails?"" And I was like ""yes"" and she was like ""well I have no arms"""

"How do you spell ""laughing out loud"" by using binary? 1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1"

"Did you hear about the man who drank bug spray? He pissed off."

"My friend has canceled our lunch plans three days in a row. I'm starting to think she really doesn't like lunch."

"A police officer accidentally arrested a judge who was dressed like a convict for a costume party. He quickly learned to never book a judge by their cover."