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Joke of the Day

"If I ever go missing, please put my photo on a Tequila bottle because nobody I know drinks milk."

"When people tell me ""You're gonna regret that in the morning"" I sleep in til noon, because I'm a problem Solver"

"What do you call a crazy bug on the moon? A luna-tick."

"If Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a boat and it capsizes. Who survives? America."

"Knock knock! 'Who's there?' 'To' 'To who' '*to whom' 'Kill yourself'"

"whats the difference between your sister and a mosquito? The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it"

"i'm trying to lose weight so i ordered a salad and i immediately got annoyed thinking about the salad i would have to eat."

"I'm white and I don't tell racist jokes because racism is a crime, and crime is for black people."

"A man purchases a kitten, which he's having trouble house breaking. What does his friend say when he comes to visit? Your house is quite the cat-ass-trophy."