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Joke of the Day

"Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner? He was exceeding the feed limit!"

"I may not look good naked, but I'm a beautiful person on the insi.... Hahahaha just kidding I look great naked"

"What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common? They can smell it but they can't eat it!"

"You need some David in your life... Because Jesus clearly isn't helping you."

"Just saw a lady saying grace over her salad. Lettuce pray."

"What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer? One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer."

"Why are oil miners and police men mortal enemies? One brings black stuff and the other gets rid of it"

"Did you know ""bathtub"" backwards is still ""bathtub""? It's not, but for a second there you believed me."

"Women's underwear is a great example of how you can make something half-assed and it still become very successful Thought of this in traffic yesterday"

"Just passed a guy wearing a ""#1 Dad"" T-shirt. On my way home now to ask my kids what the fuck."