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Joke of the Day

"I hope there's a scientist somewhere in the world right now working on a way for Coldplay to get more whoa-oh-ohs into a 3 minute pop song."

"What did people say after two satellite dishes got married? The wedding was dull, but the reception was great."

"What do you call it when two designers argue about what file type to export a graphic to? Getting into a bit of a .tiff!"

"I can't believe all of this violence and rioting is happening... ... all because Craig Ferguson is leaving his show."

"Two dust pans were dry humping.. I was like dude, get a broom already!"

"The pollen is so bad this year ...that it has the addicts turning their meth back into sudafed!"

"What do you call a spitting vampire? Spatula."

"My wife was fixing the caulk around our tub... Me: You should use some caulk softener to make that easier. Wife: Is that like a picture of your mom or something? (actual conversation)"

"I know I'm late to the party but why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9."

"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground Up and in the Freezer."