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Joke of the Day

"How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an altar boy"

"Why did the LAPD leave the Dodger game early? They wanted to beat the crowd."

"What do you call a pachyderm that sings jazz? Elephants Gerald"

"Why'd the toilet feel abused? Because it took a lot of shit."

"Did you hear the joke about the guy who shined a light at his shadow? It starts off dark, but the ending is bright."

"I am a joke And my kid is the punch line"

"Library charged my Visa $15.60 for my son's lost Dr. Seuss book. Teri got mad oh yes she did, Teri got angry and grounded her kid."

"When I want something a little healthier than an ice cream sandwich, I usually go for an ice cream salad."

"What's the difference between humor and odor? Humor is a shift of wit."

"[emergency room] ""We need to put pressure on the wound!"" [to wound] We've been together 6 months now, I think we should move in together"""