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Joke of the Day

"The three unwritten rules of life. 1. 2. 3."

"It's a little sad that today's youth don't get to experience a red rubber dodgeball to the face like we did back in the day."

"George, are you high? No mom. The smell is incense, my eyes are red from browsing reddit for hours, and I'm just keeping that unicorn here until Tim comes back from Florida."

"What does Batman use to wash his hair? Conditioner Gordon."

"Oedipal Arrangements ...just like your mom used to make."

"A satanist asked why I would 420 blaze it, When i could 180 and praise it."

"I always pick up a huge cucumber up at walmart and yell to my wife ""you said you wanted the biggest one right"" Because I'm a great husband"

"I think OJ Simpson should be on Dancing with the Stars... I have a funny feeling he really knows how to cut a rug."

"What time is it when 10 elephants are chasing you? 10 after 1"

"If you ever think you're not creative, buy a Bowflex and marvel at the creativity of your excuses not to use it."