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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an Hawaiin and a Muslim ? One always offer a snack bar after saying hello"

"Yesterday I went rollerblading, and I ran into batman. So I say ""Oy! Batman! Come skate with me! . . . "" But Batman just says ""I'M NOT WEARING HOCKEY PADS!"""

"Grapes for breakfast it is! Beautiful, fermented, aged, liquified grapes."

"baby proofing your house is easy, just lock your doors. There's no way they could get in unless there were like hundreds of them or somthing"

"having sex for pleasure Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out."

"So buddy, how's life in North Korea? I can't complain."

"I have a Mexican friend from the United States... He said he was Juan of US."

"Your son has been suspended ""for what?"" He hit a kid who was picking on another child ""so what, yall ran out of ice cream to give him?"""

"Life is a lot like sex... It's way too short and rarely lives up to the expectation."

"I brought a classical musician back from the past to prove that my time-machine works, but I can't find him. He must be Haydn."