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Joke of the Day

"How does Winnie the Pooh open his honey pot? With his bear hands. Thank the Chive for that one."

"A Limerick There once was a barmaid in Salles, On her chest wrote the price of ale. And on her behind, For the sake of the blind, Was the same information in Braille."

"Don't waste electricity. Would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?"

"It's probably not relevant at all that the big tough republicans always seem to be the most terrified of everything."

"I use to have a job working in an elevator... it had its ups and downs"

"Butt weight. There's more!"

"LAUNDROMAT BLUES Q: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women? A: Because a woman who can't afford her own washing machine won't be able to support you."

"What do you call a fish with no eye? Fsssssssh"

"If you guys don't hear from your sexy lady friend TC today it's because he's spending Father's Day with his family."

"dentist was flossing my teeth & said ""they're very tight"" & I said ""yeah they're homies"" & he laughed so loud that it made me uncomfortable"