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Joke of the Day

"Sorry I didn't text you back, my hands are sore from karate chopping loaves of bread in half and feeding them to starving children all day."

"When one door closes, another opens. Also, you can open the closed door. That's how doors work. How do you know so little about doors?"

"It's hard having a cheesy personality... I get Provolonely."

"why did the chicken cross the road 69 ahhahaaha"

"ME (pulling wishbone): I won WIFE: what'd u wish for? M: uh world peace W: Nice *human-sized bacon strip walks into kitchen* Hey, what's up?"

"What kind of cheese do metalheads eat? BRIEEEEEEEEEEEE. I hate myself"

"What did the Pencile say to the other pencil? what did the pencile say to the other pencil the answer is........... Your Looking Sharp :)"

"I've got a new job in a biscuit factory. So far I've made a packet."

"What's DJ Khaleds favourite number? 11, because it has another one"

"Your life is like a box of chocolates It will kill your dog."