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Joke of the Day

"A hammer and a Nail cost $1.10 The hammer is a dollar more than the nail, how much is does the nail cost?"

"The people at Netflix are geniuses. I'm impressed that they were able to make a show based on a swimming pool game! I wonder what they'll try next."

"What would you call two banana skins ? A pair of slippers."

"Have you heard about the two gay Irishmen? Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald"

"I was just watching some porn and I've got to tell you, I don't think those girls were REALLY studying before they started fooling around."

"Did you hear about Kurt Cobain's new album? He did a cover of The Wall by Pink Floyd"

"What do you call it when Charlie Sheen's brother has sex with him? Emilio Incestevez"

"If it's so good why can't I find a single car wash that carries the Brazilian wax thingy you guys keep tweeting about?"

"George Carlin: Dead. Leslie Nielsen: Dead. Mitch Hedberg: Dead. Greg Giraldo: Dead. Dane Cook: A-Okay. God has some explaining to do."

"What's the slowest, most painful way to kill yourself? Get married."