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Joke of the Day

"How did the dog make anti-freeze? He stole her blanket."

"My friend claims that he is a blacksmith But everything he makes is forged."

"How do you know Adam and Eve weren't black? Have you ever tried to take a rib from a nigger?"

"So Stub Hub isn't a dating site for quadriplegics?"

"Do cats like Deadmau5? I mean he is a mouse himself, but maybe they like the concept?"

"Finally decided on my thesis paper. It's a LOTR themed essay in defense of Sauron Titled ""Getting away with Mordor"""

"[notice son's not home] [text] Me: IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT! I SAID HOME BY 11! 17: You were my ride. Me: Oh. Where are you again?"

"Little girl/boy: ""Mommy, I want to be a [PERSON I DISAGREE WITH] when I grow up."" Mom: ""Well pick one sweetie, you can't do both."""

"Did you hear about the owl who fell in love with the goat? They had a hootin-nanny."

"You can't spell ""A.D.D."" without ""hey what is that is that some Go-Gurt"""