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Joke of the Day

"Noah build an ark ""what? why"" I'm gunna flood the earth ""just give me fish powers"" [jealous he didn't think of that] JUST DO WHAT I SAY!"

"[while titanic is sinking] me: [mouth full of shrimp at the buffet] I can't believe no one is eating these lol"

"The teacher asked Simon to say his name backwards. ""No mis"" he replied"

"People that still call into radio stations are probably doing it from house phones."

"I just forked over $5,000 for a reincarnation seminar I figured what the hell you only live once."

"I didn't like the fungi at first, But then it grew on me."

"TIL that there is an exotic instrument only select children can master. Apparently the Fogle Fiddle has been around since 1977, who knew?"

"What does Charlie Sheen say when he's having sex with a Vietnamese Lady? Nguyenning!"

"Today in 1892, JRR Tolkien was born. He wrote about all the horrible things that will happen if you put a ring on it."

"I wouldn't be so scared of spiders if they were wearing tiny shoes."