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Joke of the Day

"if ur getting chased by a bunch of drunk 90's kids just yell out ""in west Philadelphia born & raised"" then u got like 2 min to run"

"Mommy, they call me nymphomaniac at school... -Don't worry Lissa, it's just kid's stuff. Now you go to sleep before dark, or the Boogeyman will come at eat you. -Yeah! He should come and eat my pussy!"

"Guy on plane : So, where are you going to? Me : I'm guessing it's the same place you're going."

"The name CONstitution sounds so negative. Since 'pro' is the opposite of 'con' we should call it prosti..... oh wait."

"How does a nun lose her virginity? Dresses up as an altar boy"

"Me: I like that... Me: *looks at price tag* .... Me: I don't like that anymore."

"You can tell a lot about a woman from her hands, for instance if they are firmly around your throat she is probably slightly upset."

"How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than 30, my basement is still dark."

"""I think I have split personalities"", ......Said Steve, being frank."

"Are you African? [NSFW] Because you are a frican bitch. Zing~!"