136747

Joke of the Day

"A man walked inside an interior decorators convention and everyone was laughing... He asked what's so funny. ""It's an inside joke""."

"Why is a pig in a water trough like a penny? Because its head is on one side and its tail is on the other."

"Veterinarian- You're here to discuss your dog's salivation? Me- No. My dog's a good dog, he'll go to Heaven! I'm here about his slobbering."

"What's the difference between a pregnant lady and a light bulb? You can unscrew the light bulb. - Steve Martin, ""My Blue Heaven"""

"What is the temperature inside a tauntaun? Luke warm!"

"Sometimes on a clear cool night I look at the stars for hours and wonder what cool things I'd be doing if my Internet weren't down."

"Me: You're kidnapping me? Where're we going? Can we feed my cats first? Is there a ransom? Cool van. My name- Him: Changed my mind. Get out."

"Before he leaves for work, my husband whispers the 3 words I love to hear him say... ""I made coffee"""

"If used correctly, Twitter can be used as an antidepressant. Just don't take it as a suppository."

"What is a Power Adapter's favorite rock band? AC/DC"