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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about the blind prostitute? Ya gotta hand it to her..."

"My wife is a psycho, this tweet isn't a joke its a cry for help."

"Just heard a woman compare different products by calling the last one ""even differenter."" I am now embarrassed to be human."

"I just watched a 15 year old girl who was busy texting walk into a light post and I am no longer an atheist."

"If you knew what I considered to be my ""best behavior"" it's doubtful you'd advise me to be ""on it""."

"If you hold the ocean up to your ear, it sounds just like a sea shell."

"""Hello, would you like to take part in a one-question survey?"" ""Sure."" ""Great! Thanks for participating."""

"Knock knock. Who's there? Budweiser. Budweiser who? Budweiser your mother naked?"

"I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in."

"I'm so sick and tired of my friends who can't handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me 3x while carrying me to the car!"