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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a black and a white fairytale? White begins, ""once upon a time,"" black begins, ""y'all motherfuckers ain't gonna believe dis shit!"""

"Wizard: Give me a burger Waiter: what's the magic word? Wizard: Abracadabra Waiter: *now a hamster* I meant please, but ok"

"My local steak house serves nothing but vegetarian bc cows are vegetarian"

"Something is good and/or bad and makes me happy and/or angry. Please copy and paste this as your status update if you agree and/or disagree."

"I bet Abe Lincoln only paid with $5 bills then as the cashier's face lit up, he'd smugly grin ""yep."""

"A single gene that is dramatically different in chimpanzees and humans may explain why apes cannot talk. Oh well, at least they can still communicate through rap music."

"An Old German Visits the Doctor. His doctor comes into the room with a frown on his face, and tells him he has Lung Cancer. ""Well,"" the German says, ""I did Nazi that coming."""

"How to get out of a bad date. 1. Pull fake baby out of your bag. 2. Tell your date to help pick a name. 3. Start taking family photos."

"I might not be the ""best"" father in the world, but I'm also bad with money & know how to beat a polygraph."

"did you hear Oxygen and Magnesium got together **OMg** All I knew, till last week Oxygen was dating Potassium But they said it was just **OK**"