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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a mexican and a perubian? The passport"

"If I can use dollar bills to make it rain, are dollar coins golden showers?"

"If you're wondering what all these scratches on my chest are from, it's because my cat hates to get in the hot tub with me."

"What's the difference between Adolf Hitler and Neville Chamberlain? Neville Chamberlain takes a weekend in the country. Adolf Hitler takes a country in the weekend. (First told circa 1938)"

"We now have TWO Wawa's by the interstate. The one on the east side of I4 is not so bad. But the other one, whoa. It's the Wawa West over there."

"""I literally died."" - white girls in heaven."

"What did the silly boy take his bicycle to bed with him? Because he didn't want to walk in his sleep."

"Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted."

"""I can't believe we're selling this house. So many memories. Man, if walls could talk..."" WALL: ""I saw you vacuum up your kid's hamster."""

"My dick's like Pizza Hut... Kids eat for free."