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Joke of the Day

"I'm not informed enough to vote.... Who do you think i am? A redditor?"

"Vampire selfies are just phones floating in front of bathroom mirrors."

"I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if architects in those days had just made their towns big enough for everyone."

"TIL, over 23% of jokes on /r/jokes are just ripoffs of previous ones Whooooops... Wrong sub( )"

"Say ""raise up lights"" out loud. You just said ""razor blades"" with an Australian accent."

"Putin's message to tourists: Visit Istanbul While he still exists..."

"(Art Museum) Me:*sees nature painting* *pulls out sharpie* *draws sun in the top left corner* My 5th Grade Art Teacher: *thumbs up* nice"

"I was the first person to install trampolines in musician's tour buses and now everybody is jumping on the bandwagon."

"I may be nodding and smiling, but I'm secretly diagnosing you."

"Whats long and hard and has cum in it? a cucumber"