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Joke of the Day

"Me: Do you have any dreams? Him:...I'm running on a giant hamster wheel and a squirrel wearing a tuxedo comes... Me: ASPIRATIONS YOU IDIOT"

"I read a couple of interesting articles... ""A"" and ""The"""

"Why are computers in Palestine really fast? Because they've got Ramallah."

"I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point."

"Yo mamma so dumb..... That she climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side."

"What do you call a homosexual wizard who isn't Albus Dumbledore? Gayndalf The Gay"

"What did the redneck say to his girlfriend after they broke up? ""Its ok, we can still be cousins."""

"Chemists do tell jokes, but there's no reaction because all their people skills Argon. Omg, that's Sodium funny, right? Na? Okay."

"Well, I don't know how my tattoo is gonna look when I'm 60, Carol, but I know you'll be dead by then so"

"No Grandma, he has a hair piece, not herpes"