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Joke of the Day

"Q: What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised? A: When you get a divorce you get rid of the whole prick!"

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"I caught my girlfriend giving a midget a blowjob... ...I can't believe she'd stoop that low."
"What do you call the ghost of a detective? An inspectre."
"[moving her panties to the side] HEY MAA, I'M MAKING ROOM FOR MY LEGOS IN YOUR UNDERWEAR DRAWER."
"Bondage devotees trussed each other."
"What do you call a rifle that has been fired recently? A shotgun"
"Why is the Queen only 30cm Tall She is a Ruler..."
"I meant to take Tylenol PM, but I accidentally took Tylenol PMS I just think it's funny how you guys only care about me when you want upvotes. Whatever. I'm fine."
"ME: I hate him with 1/16th of the fibers of my being GUY: Not every fiber? ME: I hate alot of people. I'm not wasting all my fibers on 1 guy"
"Guy: There's a suit booked for me at a 5 star hotel. Girl: It's called a 'Suite' Guy: No it's a 'Suit'. I'm a waiter."