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Joke of the Day

"I was once a man stuck in a woman's body. I'll never mistake superglue for lube again."

"I thought I would have to kill my bitch of a wife, but then she suffocated on saran wrap. I was so Glad."

"A 3-year old boy A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?' 'Not yet,' she replied."

"Did you hear about the guy who died of an epileptic fit? He had a very flashy ending"

"What did the necrophile say to his ex-girlfriend? ""I only loved you for your body!"""

"I took my prostate exam the other day and... So just last week I went for my first prostate exam. It was really difficult and I couldn't answer most of the questions"

"Can anyone recommend a good website where people I knew in high school post pics of their meals?"

"PLEASE LEAVE CHRIS BROWN ALONE, in the woods, surrounded by a pack of wolves."

"What part of a chicken is a musical instrument? The drumstick. (Had this joke stuck in my head for a while so felt like sharing it.)"

"""Hello Kitty"" should have been a brand of condoms..."