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Joke of the Day

"[everyone in the STI clinic glaring at my Pokemon shirt] ""No no it means like, I want to catch all the Pokemon"""

"I had a huge erection. I started running and hit a wall. You know what broke? My nose."

"The fight against Hilary and Donald If Hilary wins a door to women's rights will be opened and if Donald Trump won the there won't be anyone to open that door"

"Careful girls... fat guys just want to get into your pantries."

"What is Moses's favorite beer? Busch Light."

"How easy is it to stroll along on pies? Well, it's no cakewalk."

"Spiderman's villain should just be a glass jar and a piece of paper."

"A frog literally just intentionally threw himself under my lawn mower I guess he wanted to Kermit suicide. I hate myself. I'm sorry."

"How can Penn State fix their problem Rebrand themselves as the Catholic church."

"What does Patrick Stewart say during tantric sex? ""Make it slow."""