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Joke of the Day

"[VIDEO] Cristiano screams like a goat https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elOlE-wEpoE&feature=youtu.be CR7 screaming like a goat, enjoy"

"ME: *smashes bottle into a ship* MAN: Oh cool, what are you naming it? ME: I'm not *smashes another bottle* I just hate ships"

"Is it rude to go up to someone with an eyepatch and say ""Was it all fun and games up until that point?"""

"Whats better then getting a gold medal in the Paralympics? Walking."

"Who do penguins celebrate Hanukkah with? The Icebergs"

"My 8 yr old just asked me how the first microchip was built at the exact time I was wondering what other animals got sweaty armpits."

"What do Japanses pirates do? Fry pranes."

"It's been so long, I think my virginity is growing back."

"I hate when people think my real name is Jennifer, because it's not, it's Jennitalia."

"My boss is sending me abroad for a business trip next week. I hope she's a blonde."