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Joke of the Day

"For fun, I steal my married friends phones & change my name to 'Brandy from the club' then repeatedly call them & hang up at 3am. #topahole"

"My friend got a dog for his wife. I told him it was a fair trade."

"RIP George Michael I guess this was his 'Last Christmas'. What? Too soon?"

"""Instagram announced they will allow users to see who viewed their profile..."" *wakes up in cold sweat*"

"Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I'm feeling a connection."

"About an actress. Did you hear about that actress who killed her husband? Reese something... Witherspoon? No Witherknife."

"Alzheimer's can't be that bad You get a chance to meet new people every day."

"Why are periods called ""Aunt Flo""? Because for 3-5 days, it's a PROGRESSIVE pain in the ass."

"I need your best NSFW joke, before our coffee break!"

"If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it...... He's gay, definitely gay."