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Joke of the Day

"you deserve more than a guy who wears t-shirts with ""witty"" sayings that he bought from jcpenney."

"My girlfriend got mad and said she need some time and distance as she left the house crying... I still don't get it why she wants to calculate the velocity"

"Where does a cow stop to drink? The milky way!"

"When the crooked hamburger took it on the 'lamb' where did it go? Oh 'ewe' know!"

"""She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts."" -Romans 1:15"

"What do you call that gnarly smell around cow pastures? DAIRY-AIR!"

"the Bible says ""If a man is to lay with another man he should be stoned."" in my experience it helps"

"Thank god attorneys let us know they're attorneys ""at law"" so we don't assume they're attorneys at garlic bread or something."

"How do blind people know when they're done wiping?"

"*holds flashlight under chin* ""...and then the typo appears, AFTER you hit send!!"" *everyone screams in horror*"