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Joke of the Day

"I think my family is really going to dig the 15 minute powerpoint I've created of the things I am thankful for at Thanksgiving dinner."

"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but you have to get them in there first."

"What is a clowns fart made of? Laughing gas."

"A group of guys with ponytails is called a flock of Steven Seagulls"

"If you weigh 99 pounds and eat 1 pound of nachos you will be 1% nachos!"

"What's the difference between a corn farmer with epilepsy and a prostitute with dysentery? One shucks between fits and the other fucks between shits."

"Just got out of the shower and realized I forgot to wash my butthole. Oh well, there's always next Sunday."

"A Rabbi, a Canadian, and a New Yorker walk into a bar Just kidding the Rabbi was actually a terrorist and they all died in the explosion!"

"The NFL has hired their first female referee. She will throw flags for penalties the teams committed 5 years ago."

"I have discovered that theirs no popcorn in popcorn chicken. I guess there's no point in bothering with hash browns then."