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Joke of the Day

"Job Interview : ""What is your great weakness?"" - Honesty - I don't think that honesty is a weakness - i don't give a shit what you think !"

"Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they can spend years at C!"

"I've been watching so much porn lately I spit on my hotdog before putting it the bun."

"What did the hipster stoner call his marijuana pipe? Ira Glass"

"Why does Pinocchio lie? Because he is a fucking liar!"

"Manute Bol walks into a bar And says ""The highballs are on me!"""

"I hear they designed the newest iPhone to fit perfectly in your hand, right where your money used to be."

"I hit 350lbs on the bench press today And I think I broke a rib after I fell on it.."

"*walking in forest* *tree falls and makes a loud noise* WOAH *tree gets up* *tree pull a knife on me* ""You didn't hear SHIT"" *tree runs off*"

"Didja hear about the new LGBT hockey team gonna play in Boston? (Wait for it ... wait for it ...) Yeah - the Boston Bruouts ..."