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Joke of the Day

"I saw an oldman get hit by a car. He didn't hear me say ""look out!"" Because I didn't say anything."

"applebees is a word that starts off pretty tame but takes a dangerous twist"

"So i was making a software to help people to stop procrastinating and never finished it."

"Two sausages are sitting in a skillet... One sausage says to the other, ""It's getting a little hot in here..."" The other sausage turns to him and says, ""OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!"""

"So a woman walks out of the kitchen... ..."

"Do you think George Clooney has an iTunes playlist called Clooney Tunes?"

"How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate his tits a lot."

"Walking down the street, I heard a car alarm go off ... ... And I thought, ""Oh my God, someone's stealing a car!"""

"A Priest, A Pervert and A Pedophile Walks into a Bar"

"Trainer: What's the most intense part of your work out? Me: Getting into my sports bra."