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Joke of the Day

"I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend. Seriously, I'm taking a selfie and you're in the background"

"What black & White and cool as f**k? A fridge with a leather jacket on."

"I want to make a porno with Larry Bird and Dennis Rodman at 6 in the morning... It's called early bird gets the worm"

"I think single ply toilet paper is very spiritual. I easily get in touch with my inner self."

"some penguins also can't fly because of their previous statements on Hamas and Afghanistan"

"How Old Is Your Father Teacher: ""How old is your father?"" Boy: ""As old as me."" Teacher: ""How can that be?"" Boy: ""He became a father only when I was born?"""

"Energizer Bunny made a mess.... I put the batteries in backwards and it just kept cumming and cumming"

"My girlfriend is the squareroot of -100. She's a 10, but it sucks because she's imaginary."

"Living in Switzerland wouldn't be so bad. The flag is a plus."

"Broken puppets for sale. No strings attached."