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Joke of the Day
"Life is like a box of idiots."
Next Joke
"People keep telling me i'm self-deprecating. I don't think i deserve that."
"No thanks, people who hum to themselves. I've seen enough horror movies to know that you probably just killed someone or you're possessed."
"My daughter has reached that age where she is asking embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she said ""is that the best you can do?""."
"A bunch of white men came up with ways to solve institutional racism, and all without having to listen to even one black person. GREAT JOB!"
"Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and wonder, ""Do my children just spit directly at their face when brushing their teeth?"""
"What's a pirates favorite type of thread? Yaaaaarn."
"Two Scarecrows are standing out in a field... One says to the other, ""Hey man!"""
"If a tree falls in the woods, and there are no English majors around to hear it... does is lay on the ground, or lie?"
"TIL 9/10 redditors are bad at math. I'm glad to be the 1%."