13030

Joke of the Day

"Considering you can be anything you want on the internet, it's amazing how many choose to be stupid."

"What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? Dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-antdead-antdead-ant"

"Kissing 101: 1. Open your mouth 2. Wider, that's it. 3. Stick out your tongue 4. Then walk towards her and pray she doesn't run away."

"What do you call siblings that play soccer? Umbros"

"At Fantastic Beasts & some nerds are in Hogwarts robes so I don't know why they're giving me the stink eye for my Wonder Woman outfit"

"One good thing has come from the Ebola virus The white nations might have a chance of winning a marathon next Olympics."

"Einstein said ""If you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself."" Which I guess makes me an expert in secretive anal sex."

"A horse walks into a bar. ""Too late,"" says the bartender, ""we're joking about the pope now."""

"Everyone wants a white Christmas... but all Christmases matter!!!"

"How to get the attention of a crew of bricklayers... Yell ""Eh, Tony!"""